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Deloitte’s Nancy Ewings Gives Four Tips Working Mother’s Can Balance Career and Family From the “Partner Track”

Finding your own way to balance career advancement with family obligations requires creativity and support

BY NANCY EWINGS, SENIOR MANAGER, DELOITTE & TOUCHE LLP


I am always amused by the varying reactions I receive from those who ask me “How do you survive in a professional services firm when you have kids?” While it is true that professional service firms can have an ominous reputation as it relates to professional women with children, I am still here after many years; kids and career both thriving!

The bottom line is you have to perform in order to succeed in your career. How you do it is different for everyone; you need to be flexible and find what works for you.

1. LET GO OF THE GUILT
I felt guilty taking time away from work, I felt guilty working and taking time away from my children – it’s a no-win situation. While easier said
than done, the sooner you can come to terms in your own mind that guilt is a useless emotion, the happier you will be.

2. TAKE ADVANTAGE AND USE THE SUPPORT AROUND YOU
Whether it be family, friends, the school programs, or your children’s friends’ families. Sometimes it is hard to let go of our ideas of what a “mother” looks and acts like. Let your partner do more with the children (and don’t correct them even if you know there is a better way!). My husband (who also has a demanding professional career) has always been the parent to get the children ready in the morning and pick them up at night. This was a huge gift which enabled me to create balance in both worlds.

3. DON’T TRY AND DO IT ALL.
Superwoman is a fictional character! I designed an alternate work arrangement during my career with my employer to help me bring balance to my work and my family’s lives. Being in the client service business, it can be a challenge implementing an alternate work arrangement. You are still expected to provide top service to your clients, even if you are on a reduced schedule.

I decided to work an 80% workload after my first child was born. This did not mean that I religiously took one day off every week – I took time when I was able to take it – half days, a few hours every day, and blocks of time throughout the year. From my perspective, the Firm was being flexible with my work arrangement, and I also needed to be flexible in the way I implemented it – it’s a two way street.

After my second daughter was born, I was offered an opportunity to work for two years in our national office. This position would allow for a less erratic schedule. I knew that this could potentially be putting my career on hold for a couple of years, but with two young children, the thought of diving back into the trenches right away was less than optimal at this point in my life – I was still getting up in the middle of the night sometimes! I had to let go of my pre-conceived ideas of how my career was going to develop and think “outside the box” a little.

Easier said than done, as a self declared type-A, and surrounded by type A’s at work, it was a struggle at times to pull back for a while to help balance work and family. I had to continually remind myself this was a conscious decision I made and it was supported by very good personal reasons.

4. BE CREATIVE IN THE WAY YOU WORK.
I have certainly embraced the technology age, having a BlackBerry allows me to stay connected wherever I am – even while doing arts and crafts in kindergarten! I schedule conference calls near the end of the day so I can drive home while on the call. I leave the house very early in the morning to beat the rush which allows me to get home almost every night for dinner with the family, and on some days I can work from home.

I have taken my kids to work on the occasional weekend while in a pinch – set them up in a conference room with a whiteboard, DVD player, pads of paper and sticky notes. While I was beating myself up for dragging them to the office, one of them recently asked me “When are you going to take us to the office again?” My children may not be experiencing a childhood similar to mine, but they have shown me that what I am creating for my children is a different, and just as special, set of childhood memories.